I only buy the paperfor the obits and ads

I took my girlfriend Rachel's hubby to the oral surgeon today to have 2 wisdom teeth removed (blech!). The waiting room was what you might call an eclectic mix of people, many of whom were missing teeth. Guess that may have had something to do with why they were at the oral surgeon? Several also seemed as though they'd probably had a hard life. They had to take Josh back several times, as they lost his chart and had to re-x-ray him. I wasn't feeling so positive about their effectiveness, but it didn't seem to bother him, and, well, it is his mouth. During one of his trips back, I overhear the two older gals next to me discussing the Paper. They were extolling the virtues of the OKC paper vs. the Tulsa paper (a discussion I've had many times) and the fact that they hope their Social Security checks weren't involved in the current mix-up. But then, they got to the heart of the matter, the good stuff, what the paper's all about. The one woman (who, yes, was in fact missing teeth) turns to her friend and says, "You know, I only buy the paper for the obituaries and the ads." You know, the important stuff. And, apparently she buys both the OKC (100 miles away) and the Tulsa paper for both. Hum. Interesting. It totally struck me as funny.

But you know, we never get the last laugh. Whenever I laugh at someone out loud or internally, I always get mine. After some inner debate, I finally ask the gal at the desk if they have a restroom and shlep all of my stuff with me (my iPod, my Sudoku book, and my purse) into said room. Wouldn't ya know it, while I'm in there, I hear, "Who is with Joshua?" Uh...........that would be me.  So I pipe up from within the bathroom, "Oh! Me!" And hurridly extricate myself, making sure to wash my hands extra throughly because you know they were listening. I collected Josh and his instructions and we were on our merry way to the pharmacy and Braum's for a milkshake, which he has to eat with a spoon because he's not allowed to use a straw for a week! I couldn't eat out. At restaurants, I can't drink my beverage without a straw. Yes, I'm odd, but we already knew that!

My Husband Likes Will and Grace

and other random musings. I love that Chris watches Will & Grace with me. I may have mentioned this before, but I think it's the coolest. Most guys consider W&G a chick show, but Chris doesn't care. He loves Jack and Karen as much as I do (well, maybe not quite as much...I have a secret desire to be my own version of Karen Walker minus the alcohol and drugs) and laughs even more some times. It's so funny when he gets really tickled (especially at himself) because his whole body starts to shake and he doesn't make any noise at all.

I suffer from the wanderlust. I suffer terribly. I want to be traveling. I always want to be traveling. I want to get paid to travel. I secretly long to be a tour guide. Yes, I am a nerd. I'm not afraid to admit it. I want to travel the world. I want to see it all. There are a few hot spots I'd like to avoid, but I want to see/experience it all. And not just the touristy stuff. I want to have meals in a house with locals and go to church with them and smile and nod while they talk about me in their foreign tongue. I want to visit every state in the Union (and the protectorates) and as many countries as possible (I think I'm up to 16 right now). But how? How do you afford it? How could I do that now? I'm married. I have responsibilities. We want to buy a house, and he wants kids. Those things are not conducive to extended travels to countries without running water. So for now, I'll just have to long. And live vicariously through Casey, who spent a lot of days traveling around the world. His website is www.whereiscasey.com, and I'm loving reading every word and savoring the pictures. Some day, it will be me. Oh yes, it will be me. I just have to make do with the cruise we're taking to 2 new countries this year. I guess I can find a way.

My dogs have me pegged. Totally pegged. Today, there was something seriously interesting going on outside. I have no idea what, but Scooby was extremely excited about it! So, he came to get me. It's hard to believe that the dogs really do come and get me - they are dogs, after all. But no, they really do. I tested him today. He was outside barking his ever loving head off. Then, he came into the room I was in upstairs still barking. I ignored him. So he came over and jumped up at me and barked some more. Then, headed to the door and barked some more. Then came and jumped up at me and barked. Then, back to the door and guess what? Barked. Shocking, huh? And so, we continued as I slowly followed him down the stairs, stopping every couple of stairs to see if this really was true, and him coming back and barking more when I stopped. By this time, Mimi had joined in and threw in the occassional "yeah, what he said" bark for good measure.

So, they got me out the door, and they just continued to bark and turn and look at me and bark. I had no idea what was going on, but I'm pretty sure they wanted my help. Seing as I don't speak Scottie, and they don't speak human, I turned around and returned to my computer. And the barking/leading returned...twice. Finally, the third time, I went out the front gate to see what was going on. And there, near our fence was a squirrell. Few things get our dogs as excited as they were, but when they see squirrells and bunnies (and other small woodland creatures and the occassional bird), they can taste it. They're ready. So, I'm pretty sure said woodland creature had been in their territory. In order to appease them, I picked each one up in turn and let them peak over the gate and then walked them around out in front of the gate so they could see there was nothing (we conveniently missed the rodent). Funny thing, neither dog liked when I took the other beyond the gate. Each got left behind and cried about it. Big cry babies. So, like I said, they've got me pegged.

In other random news, our flourescent lights in the kitchen have gone out. This is bad. We have 3 smallish window in this condo and none of them sheds any light in the kitchen. In the middle of the day, it's like it's 9 pm in there. At first, we thought it was the light bulbs (all 4 at once, I asked?), but after purchasing 4 of said light bulbs, it was determined that no, in fact the ballast is going out. I'm fairly sure that the knower of all things, Mr. Barba had never even heard of a ballast before last year, but now he is totally qualified to diagnose one. (the other knower of all things, Bob, has kindly provided a second opinion and concurs.) This, of course, requires a call to the landlord. We're renting, and no matter how much I want it fixed, he gets to do it. Well, I say that now, but after waiting for Mr. Barba to call said landlord for 4 days and the landlord sitting on it for a similar amount of days, I'm starting to get tired of it. Yes, I could have called, but for some reason, the Mister vehemently says no every time I suggest it. Could it be that he has a working relationship (second job) with the landlord and doesn't see my letting him have it as conducive for business?

We had Carraba's tonight. Not what I'd call a Weight Watcher's approved meal, and as Bob and I started WW again on Friday, I should be consuming only WW approved meals. But, how am I supposed to see to cook? The other night, Mr. Barba brought down a halogen lamp from upstairs. Yeah, big help. Actually, it helped a lot more when he figured out it was a 3-way light and he'd had it on the first way. And still, we wait for the handyman. Every once in a while, the lights come on for no reason whatsoever and we just leave them on in hopes that they will remain. Unfotunately, each time this has happened, someone has forgotten and turned them off and it takes at least 24 hours for them to decide to come on again. Gotta love it. The first time it was me. The latest such incident was today. The Mister came home for lunch and I'd gone to help Bob with a training and then do my own training. The lights magically came on as I was making breakfast, so I left them on. When I came home, they'd been turned off. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr.

Clueless Trauma

So, I'm stumped. We have our final assignment for my photography class. We have to create a story told through photographs. The key is, I have to be the star. Huh? Me? A story to tell. I don't have any stories to tell. I'm totally stumped. Part of the problem is that I want to be so incredibly creative that the little bit of creativity I have is sucked right out of me. Clueless.

Last night, we had trauma. Chris was at poker. I was at home scrapping and chatting with Ms. Lin over email. All was well with the world. Then, I noticed Mimi messing with the covers on the bed. She loves to lay on the bed when she's tired, so I went to fix them for her. And what do I find? Not one, but two pee spots on the bed. OMG! That dog is lucky she is otherwise so sweet and cute, because she almost went to another home. And I'm 100% not kiding. So, now, I'm pretty sure she wasn't messing with the sheets to try to lie down. Oh no, miss smarty-pants was trying to cover up what she'd done. I've seen her do that before. And, she knew it was bad. I could tell by her demeanor as soon as I found it. I didn't even yell, and she knew how much trouble she was in. And, if that wasn't enough, it got on the comforter, which someone who shall remain nameless has insisted go without it's duvet (still not sure why). So, I haul all of the sheets and the comforter down to the laundry and put the comforter in to wash. Yes, we have a king, but our washer can handle it - we've done it before. So in it goes, and a-spinning it starts, and off I go. After a while, I notice this horrible noise, and when I go to investigate, the washer is SMOKING and leaking water. I open it up to get it to stop and feathers go everywhere. I'm totally freaking out. We're going to Vegas in 3 weeks. All disposable income is to be spent on fun! Not a new washer. In case I haven't mentioned, I'm freaking out. I called Chris and told him he HAD to come home from poker (it was after midnight anway and he turns into a pumpkin at 10). He was totally cool about it and rushed home. He even called me on the way to reassure me that it would all be okay. He got home and checked it all out, and lo and behold! the washer is OK (we think). Apparently the comforter got stuck somehow (I'm thinking the zipper) and that's what was causing the smoking (there are burn marks on it), and the sticking is what caused the ripping. I don't care, I'm just happy we don't need a new washer. And, we had a couple of king blankets so we weren't even cold last night.

Lazy Blogger...

That's me. So, lots of days have passed. Some interesting things have happened. Here's an interesting story Bob (my mom) told me today. She went into Panera Bread the other day, and the guy that works there say, "I knew it was you!" He received a resounding, "Huh?" from Bob. Turns out, he and his family were on the way home from vacation in NC and got routed through Newark (sounds convenient, huh?) and saw us in the airport. He didn't come say hi 'cuz he thought we were with a guy. Nah, we were just giving him the skinny on where to eat in 'ole Tulsey Town. He didn't say anything, but my repeated running trips to the Women's Room may have scared him off also!

I've been taking a digital photography class with Laquita at Apertures, a local camera store.  Laquita is totally fab. She's the one who sold me my awesome lens that allowed me to take the totally illegal pics in St. Mark's in Venice. I've learned a lot. Yeah, I already knew a lot of it, and could have figured most of what we've learned out on my own, but I'm so glad I didn't try it that way. The tips and tricks and ins and outs.....100% worth it! She really made me understand White Balance, which is something I was midly clueless about, but knew it could make a serious difference for me. Oh boy! I'm actually getting pics inside my house with true color without having to Photoshop them. Yippee!!!

I've also started scrapbooking again. I'm having so much fun. I'm totally lifting layouts from Jamie Waters' article in the recent Creating Keepsakes magazine. Unfortunately, I still haven't gotten the actual magazine in the mail yet ( I think the Postman is reading it), so I can only do the five that are online. It's almost like waiting for Christmas.....Hurry up and get here!!! I'll share a couple of the layouts:

a realization....

I realized a couple of things. First, I have a LOT of clothes. No, I mean tons. Second, my wardrobe is boring. Sunday afternoon, Chris and I spent a lot of time cleaning out our closets, getting rid of stuff. In the end, we had like 3 boxes to take to Goodwill. But then, as I was putting everything back in my closet, I realized how boring everything inside of it was. Lots of polos and tees from Gap and Old Navy. Sure, I like the colors, but why are those the only things in my closet? And then it hit me like a Mack truck. I've been hiding. For the last few years, every addition to my wardrobe has been something to tide me over. Clothes that fit for now until I get my body where I want it to be. How boring is that? Even though I said it was never going to happen, I've gained weight from the wedding. Now, a large part of my wardrobe doesn't fit, so Sunday I packed most of the clothes that don't fit away. I can't believe how little clothing there is in my closet. This is ridiculous! I should be able to wear fun, bright, wild (okay, not too wild, 'cuz as we all know, I am rather squarish). So, I will. I've embarked upon a new workout and eating regime, and already I feel good. It will involve the aforementioned swimming, some running (I want to do a marathon in Nov. and someday I'd like to do a triathlon...I even bought the book Slow Fat Triathlete), and some workout videos. I actually just broke down and bought the Turbo Jam videos. Can you believe? I bought something off of an infomercial! But, in my defense, I did a lot of research before making the purchase. Once I get that, I'll intersperse it along with some other DVDs (when they're workout related, they totally should still be called videos/tapes) I already have. One of them is the Biggest Loser workout. Yep, they suckered me into that one too. I did it yesterday for the first time. HOLY COW!! That Bob gave me a good workout. My gluteus maximus is a little on the sore side today. And, the workout is just a smidge easier 'cuz boy, is Bob easy on the eyes. A little cheesy, but such a cutie! So, I'm on my way. And I like it.

I don't know....

I just don't know what to say. I want to blog. I read other people's blogs and think, I should post on mine. But, I don't. Does it really matter? I mean really, who really cares if I post on my blog?

Okay, enough blog-pression....Spring in OK has definitely hit. No doubt about it. We had tornado warnings (which yes, are worse than watches) yesterday afternoon with crazy rain and the sirens going off, and according to Bob (who was on an airplane during the craziness), there were three small tornadoes that touched down in the area. What? I had no idea! Never know, though....she could be makin' it up!

I suddenly realized that IF I'm going to do the water work this summer that I'll have to take a lifeguarding class in less than 3 weeks and I haven't been working out at ALL! For the class, you have to do a 500 meter swim of breaststroke and freestyle, and I haven't been swimming in forever. So, we ran over to Academy Sports night before last and got me a suit and last night I went and swam some laps. Got in and just busted out the 500 (or there abouts because I always loose count) without much problem whatsover. I'm just hoping there's no time limit! The plan is to swim just about every day until I have to "perform" so that it's what you might call easy and I don't have performance anxiety.

So, We're Home

We've been home a couple of days, actually. New York City wore me out. Totally wore me out. Part of the problem was the crappy beds. Plus, our room in Manhattan was incredibly hot at night. So much so that I'd wake up out of overheatedness and then of course couldn't go back to sleep. Regardless, we had an awesome trip. Just a wonderful time. We spent Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday in New Jersey (only had 1 rude encounter!), and Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday morning in Manhattan. We got daily passes for the subway and went all over the city. Well, all over the island, actually. We walked across the Brooklyn Bridge and took the ferry around the Statue of Liberty/Ellis Island (and bought totally illegal fake bags in Battery Park. When Mom first saw all the bag seller, she thought they were all homeless, I had to explain that they were schlepping their wares). We saw Times Square a bunch of times. We went to Ground Zero. I had a really hard time there. I went to the Intrepid Museum (aircraft carrier). We just did so much, I'm having a hard time remembering it all! I had the most amazing piece of cheesecake from Maxie's Deli. The price, however...not so awesome. $8.52 with tax. For ONE piece! But, it was certainly to die for.

So, we had a wonderful trip and can't wait to go again, hopefully in the winter and see the Christmas Windows along 5th Ave. But, then we had to come home. And home hit me between the eyes. First, someone who shall remain nameless did nothing while I was gone. No groceries bought, no things promised got done. Serious frustration on my end. The nameless one did work really hard while I was gone, though, and thank goodness because said work pretty much funded my whole trip, but readily admits to doing not much else.

Yesterday, Chris' company announced they will likely be outsourcing their IT department. Fabulous. I was extremely upset last night, as we he (but he tried valliantly to hide it), but we remember that God is in his Heaven and has a plan for us, and all the worrying in the world won't change the big whigs minds. So, we'll just wait and see. Thank goodness Chris is highly employable. Hopefully they'll decide not to outsource his group of 2.

Also on the employment front, I may be doing swimming lessons again. I've been talking to Miller Swim School and may work with them over the summer and then continue on into the fall. I'm actually excited about it. I'll have to get my lifeguard certification again and learn how they do things, but I think it'll be fun!